Newseater - Adult Edition

Despite the fact that we take looking at porn very seriously around here, we love goofing off too. And apart from foosball, mumbletypeg, and touching ourselves Down There, one of our favorite ways of goofing off is with Flash games. Sexy, homo-flavored Flash games, to be precise. They’re usually short, often funny, and occasionally kinda hot. Hunkcraft definitely fits all three of those categories: You play the role of a painter in Olden Tymes, way back before the internets and cell phones and even Pac Man, and your objective is to seduce a hot, hunky dumbass named Dorcas (har!). See, he’s modeling for you because he and his wife are going through a rough patch and need the money. But will you be suave enough to see the money shot? If you play your cards right, it’ll take about two minutes to get through to the end—which, oddly enough, is about a minute longer than we can put up with some real life gays-for-pays!

• Hunkcraft (Flash @ anonib.com, via queermenow.net)

Original post by sturtle

The vampire girls, daughters of evil Lord Drakul, are the target of the wicked cosplay Fleshers.

So who do we root for in “Kiss Attack,” this comic art/porn/hip hop/rave/drag effort by artist Carlos Batts and his wife, the zaftig April Flores, who plays lead vampire babe Ms. Sangre? Well, in that Sangre’s sisters include Sasha Grey, Sara Vandella, and a woman named La Cholita, we vote for the bloodsuckers, stupid.

Batts enlisted the help of New Mexico artist Nathan Carlisle, whose splendid animations fleshed out characters (like Drakul) that budget restrictions prevented from human depiction.

But where “Kiss Attack” really succeeds (as it should) is in its sex scenes, each with its own color palette, such as this one with the pale and lush Sara Vandalla and this vivid (small v) exchange with Sasha Grey.

Do we really learn anything new about vampires in “Kiss Attack”? Er, no. But they’re a fuckload sexier than werewolves.

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· Carlos Batts (carlosbatts.com)
· Buy “Kiss Attack”@ Amazon (yes, amazon.com)

Original post by Gram Ponante

newVideoPlayer(”eveready_fleshbot.flv”, 506, 423,”"); People are always asking if we know where to find the world’s first porn movie or the world’s first nude model or the name of the caveman who invented jerking off. Obviously, we are much too young and spry to be able to recall such ancient history, but there are folks out there who know where to find such hidden gems. These intrepid internet explorers have tracked down what is believed to be the first pornographic cartoon, “Eveready Harton in Buried Treasure.” Made in the 1920s by (allegedly) the same animators who created family favorites for Max Fleischer and Walt Disney, it’s the heartwarming tale of a man and his giant penis just looking for a little satisfaction in a harsh and cruel world. Who says cartoons are just childish fun?

· Eveready Harton in Buried Treasure, One of the First Pornographic Cartoons Ever Made (panopticist.com)

Original post by Dashiell Bennett

newVideoPlayer(”uncanny_valley_fleshbot.flv”, 463, 387,”");
As readers of this site know all too well, there have been many, many, many attempts to meld interactive video games with hardcore porn, and despite the occasional interesting result it’s been pretty much a total failure. Why is this such an impossible task? (Besides a lack of money, creativity and raw computing power?) It has to do with a little rule of animation and robotics known as the “Uncanny Valley.” What is that exactly? Well, last week’s episode of “30 Rock” provided the clearest, most succinct explanation of the concept that we’ve heard yet—by breaking it down into a “Star Wars” metaphor, of course. See why your dream of fighting off an alien invasion while boning 3-D Hillary Scott clones is never meant to be.

· 30 Rock (full episode @ hulu.com)
· Uncanny Valley (Wikipedia)

Original post by Dashiell Bennett

newVideoPlayer(”myartschool.flv”, 463, 387,”");

Do you find yourself sitting around wondering, “Man, why won’t somebody make a full-length cartoon that’s all about a young woman making art, exploring her sexuality, and banging a bunch of dudes?” Well be happy that someone finally did: “My Art School Summer” tells the story of Carol Jones, a young woman who spends a summer at art school finding herself (and more than a few orgasms). The plot-to-sex ratio is a little too high for us to actually consider this a straight-up porn flick—but whatever you want to call it, it’s still a cute, funny cartoon with a lot of explicit animated sex. Watch the trailer and decide for yourself.

· Libido Films - My Art School Summer (libidofilms.com)

Original post by Lux Nightmare