Someone on eBay may have actually paid $34 for a Sun Chip that looks (sorta) like a vagina. For that kind of money you could pay to see a real one, but we suppose in either case you still wouldn’t be able to eat it. (ebay.com, via gorillamask.net)
Original post by Dashiell Bennett
We all have bad habits — whether it’s snoring or not picking up your socks or forgetting to wear pants to the opera — but the important thing to remember is that you can change. Do you have trouble staying monogamous? Try a threesome! Do you have foul tasting spunk? Try pineapple juice! Does the sight of vagina make you ill? Try being gay! There’s a solution to all your problems, even if you simply made up a problem in order to get your name printed in an advice column. Think you can pick out which of this week’s questions are real and which are pure entertainment? If not… hey, there’s another skill for you to learn!
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· Get Naked (timeout.com/newyork)
I’m a gay man in my mid-twenties who’s been in a relationship for the past year. I’m having some trouble in the bedroom, and it’s kind of a two-tiered problem. I began having sex when I was closeted and in college, using the Internet to arrange for random hookups … I was used to having sex with one guy, then moving on … So now, while I love my boyfriend dearly, I’m having a hard time becoming aroused in our monogamous sex life. Also, I have a foot fetish, but I’m kind of ashamed about that, too. … I want to make things better in the bedroom with my boyfriend, but I almost feel like I need to be sexually deprogrammed.
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· Love Bites (eyeweekly.com)
I am 43 and I have never penetrated a woman. I noticed that I was “abnormal” during my “first base” at the age of 28. I actually didn’t feel anything but disgust. I thought it was because of the bad taste of the girl’s saliva. But further experiences told me that all the female mouths had the same taste. The most terrible experience was the sight of the genitals of a woman when I was 30. I was extremely disappointed by the ugliness of this part of the female body. All in all I had four “sexual” experiences in my life. Each time I just felt disgust and had no arousal at all. Am I asexual?
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· In & Out (timeout.com/chicago)
When we first started dating, I had a lot of personal stuff going on, and sex was low on my list of priorities. As a result, he got the impression that I’m very conservative in that arena. He’s sexually adventurous and, undoubtedly, found me very frustrating. Now the tables have turned: My libido has returned in a big way, but he is juggling work and grad school. He’s exhausted all the time and rarely wants sex, leaving me frustrated … he no longer lusts for me. He explains that he’s so accustomed to the “prudish” version of me, he now has a mental block and can’t see me as sexy anymore. … How can we overcome the bad bedroom habits we have cultivated?
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· The Pucker Up Forums (puckerup.com)
For the past month or so me and my fiancee have spoken about a third partner possibly for sex and possibly for a relationship. She has told me that she wants to experience me with another girl and me with another guy. like most guys i’m okay with the other girl part, but the other guy part is making me nervous. I fooled around with guys when i was younger but decided that I wanted women instead. So it’s not discomfort about sexual identity but rather about trusting another man.
I’m not sure if I can trust another man with my fiancee. But I want to make her happy and whenever she talks about me and another guy double teaming her, she get’s really happy (and horny). I’ve been thinking about this for a few weeks and i’m still nervous.
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· Dear Prudence (slate.com)
I recently had breast-enhancement surgery, and there is a noticeable difference. My question is, How do I respond when people make remarks about it?
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· Dr. Dick’s Sex Advice (drdicksexadvice.com)
I have been notice that some of the skin on my dick is starting to wear away from me masturbating…there is no blood or anything like that. Just the skin turning light in color around head of my dick. I think its my grip. Is there a way the color will come back or have i rubbed the skin cells to death.
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· Jersey Girls (providencedailydose.com)
I just started seeing this guy and things are going really well, there’s just one problem: his cum tastes horrible. I’m not the squeamish type, and normally wouldn’t shy away - but, it really is disgusting. Girls I’m open to anything, any ideas on how to remedy the situation?
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· Savage Love (thestranger.com)
I get too much attention from women. When I was out of shape, women paid attention, but not as much. Now, if I wanted to, I could get all the pussy I wanted. Single pussy, married pussy, all-different-color pussy.
Is it normal for a guy to turn down so much of the pussy that gets pitched at him? I am a tall Asian guy, six foot one, 165 pounds, cut and lean, 32 but look 28. But I like to go after the hard-to-get pussy. The easy pussy that gets thrown at me, I’m not interested in. What’s wrong with me?
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· These Tropical-Colored Braces Are Going To Get You So Much Ass (theonion.com)
That is why, based on my 25 years of orthodontic experience, I can confidently say that the aqua-blue, green, and purple ligatures I have just applied to your teeth are going to put you eyeball-deep in tail before you know it.
Trust me, nothing, and I mean nothing, gets girls wetter than a guy sporting a mouthful of tropical-colored braces.
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Previously: Best of Sex Advice Archive
Original post by Dashiell Bennett
Fox News is not afraid to take on the toughest issues facing our nation today, like asking whether your vagina is depressed. Maybe it just has a case of the Mondays? (foxnews.com, more @ nerve.com + Gawker)
Original post by Dashiell Bennett
Advertising is such a subtle art form that you may not have realized that the “box” this ad is referring is actually the little one that has been Photoshopped in front of this lady’s vagina. You see, because “box” is a euphemism for vagina! Aren’t you glad we’re here to explain these things? (Copyranter)
Original post by Dashiell Bennett
Are these Mexican pastries (found in Phoenix, of course) really supposed to look like what we think they look like … or have we been working here so long that our brain just sees something dirty in everything we look at? If that’s the case, why are we so hungry right now? (guanabee.com)
Original post by Dashiell Bennett