Newseater - Adult Edition

A look back at our week that was …

· What was the casting department at VH1 thinking? As if a pornstar and a rock star would ever be interested in each other!
· For everyone who says Jenna Jameson is starting to look like a cartoon, now you know why.
· Our girlfriend went to fetish slave training camp and all we got was this lousy paysite membership … and the best girlfriend of all time!
· PEZ and bubble gum? Did you bring enough porn for every one?
· We’ve got so much that we can’t even give it away, but Susie Bright will lend you some of hers.
· The U.S. military is still not a fan of gays … or porn, for that matter.
· Bear with us as we work out our capitalization issues. We’re still waiting for the Webster’s people to call us back.
· Have a cold one for us this weekend and try not to spill anything, um … in you.

Original post by FLESHBOT

A look back at our week that was …

· It doesn’t help to be given a glimpse of what our lives could have been.
· Cruising for sex in public places can be fun and liberating, but you should bring some bail money with you just to be safe.
· But don’t worry about your dalliance getting caught on tape? Because it definitely will be.
· Dana DeArmond would like to share her life with you … all of it..
· Fixing your public image has never been easier. Thank you, Playboy!
· Disability? What disability?
· Hardcore spanking is not for the weak, but even pros need a little recovery time.
· Some days there’s only one phrase that can accurately sum up what it’s like to do this job: WTF?
· You can teach an old dick new tricks.
· Remember, there are roughly 13,000 porn movies released every year and you really do not need to watch all of them.

Original post by FLESHBOT

A look back at our week that was …

· Admit it, you’ll be thinking about Nick Lachey’s “O-face” for weeks.
· It was nice to hear from Sylvia Kristel again. She taught our younger selves so much about, um … ourselves.
· Joanna Angel went all the way to New Jersey? Has anyone heard from her since?
· Celebrity sex tape, non-celebrity sex tape … we’re not picky.
· Pornstars watch TV? Next you’re going to tell us they eat food and sleep at night too.
· We always suspected that the Abominable Snowman was a bottom. Go figure.
· A few more political speeches like this and we might still care enough to vote in 2008.
· It’s the weekend, kids … go get Boinked already!

Original post by FLESHBOT

· Be honest … does this new layout make our ass look big?
· Our West Coast Bureau Chief took a much needed vacation all the way over in Los Angeles. It really is like another planet.
· Oh, and there were awards, too! We hope IKEA doesn’t run out of shelves.
· Britney Spears can dress herself, thank you very much. She just chooses not to.
· Teenagers, you say? On teh internets? Who are the ad wizards who came up with that one?
· The Mangina … don’t leave home without it.
· You guys are getting better at this porn titles thing. Don’t quit your day jobs, though.
· Remember, it’s not the size of the axe, it’s how you swing it. Unfortunately, from now on we’ll be bludgeoning you with a heavy club. See ya, Monday!

Original post by FLESHBOT

So what did we learn this week …

· Who says pornstars don’t make good role models?
· If only Dana DeArmond had gotten to these girls sooner, they wouldn’t have had to turn to a life crime. Eh, maybe it’s for the best.
· Sasha Grey tore Penthouse a new one. If you ask us, they deserved it.
· Buck Angel: Nice guy … if you ask the right questions.
· Again with the book deals? Why is it always the smart, hardworking people who succeed?
· Celebrities sure spend a lot of time at the beach. Of course, there’s plenty more where that came from.
· Don’t bother searching for Francois Sagat—he’ll find you.
· We found a loophole in YouTube’s system. Don’t pretend like you don’t care.
· Porn Valley is a beautiful place. Just ask anyone who has no choice but to live there.
· Seriously, will you be thinking about us this weekend?

Original post by Dashiell